You love your calves, even long after they’ve grown up and left the homestead. But what if they have to come back for a spell? It’s been a growing trend that’s so prominent there’s now a name for this generation of young adults – Boomerang Kids – that are moving back in with parents to make ends meet.
Cost of living, unemployment, underemployment, student loans and divorce are all driving factors that move young adults back under their parents’ roof. It’s a lifestyle change that isn’t always as easy.
Luckily, if there’s one thing Square Cow Movers knows it’s moving. We’ve rounded up the top tips to help parents adjust to having their adult child live at home again.
Talk About It First
Before moving your child in, first have a sit down to discuss your concerns. Put everything out in the open and be up front. For many, the biggest concern is making sure their child has a strategy for getting back on their feet.
Now’s the time to also discuss money. Will they pay rent, utilities or pitch in other ways? Are they completely reliant on you? What are they doing to find a source of income? How can you help them in their search for employment? Let them know that you aren’t in the position to support them forever and that you can’t put yourself in financial jeopardy.
This may remind you a little of when they were kids and likely had a list of chores to help out with. Now that they’re adults the only difference is they should be taking on a little more responsibility. Make it clear that if they are going to shack up with you they have to do their fair share.
Adult kids that have been living on their own had freedom to do whatever they wanted. As an empty-nester you became accustomed to having the house to yourself. The best way to avoid stressful or awkward situations is to go ahead and lay out the living situation rules. Where will your kid be staying? Can he or she have people over? Which areas are off limits? What are the shared spaces?
Understand It’s a Different Dynamic
You’re all adults now, which is going to be a different dynamic than you all remember. It’s important that you treat them like adults. No doing their laundry, packing their lunch or giving them allowance. Also, don’t talk down to them. Have adult conversations as equals, and everyone will be happier.
Your kid may think they have the freedom to do what they want. Make it clear that as long as they live under your roof they will follow your rules. Just because they are grown doesn’t mean they can disregard your concerns and the parameters you’ve set in place. Treat it as if they are your tenant. If they were renting a place of their own there would be rules in the lease that they have to abide by. Same should go when they ‘rent’ a room at your house.
Keep Them Positive, Productive and Proactive
Given the situation it’s easy for your kid to get down on themselves, fall into a serious slump or even give up on getting back out on their own. It’s crucial that you give them positive support, not pity.
Encourage them to get out there and be proactive. Get them involved in volunteer work, go with them to job fairs, have family outings every now and then. Let them know that you believe in them and will do what you can to help them get back on their own two feet. The worst-case scenario is that they become couch potatoes that use you as a crutch.
It’s not going to be a stress-free situation. But following the advice above can make it a whole lot easier.
Original Source: https://squarecowmovers.com/moving-an-adult-child-into-your-home
Image Source: thechinawatch.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/boomerang-kids.png