You just got an email from the boss. He wants you do drop by his office as soon as you have a chance. The tease comes in the “Subject” line: “Great opportunity awaits!”
Suspiciously, you log-off your computer, go to the bathroom, brush your teeth, put the stuff in your coat pocket and shuffle-off to the big guy’s lair.
“Sit down,” he beckons. Obediently, you plop into a chair across from his desk. The fella gets a big smile on his face and says, “How would you like to head up our office in Missoula?” Montana, you think? Oy.
“There’s a big raise in it for you …” And to sweeten the deal he says, “It’s only 2-hours outside of Butte!”
Without giving it any thought at all, you agree. Now the hard part begins. Telling the wife and the kids. “The company will pay all of our moving expenses and shell-out the money for our monthly mortgage here in Austin until the house sells,” you meekly explain.
The wife looks convinced, but asks one question, “What about the children?”
What about the Children?
Experts used to believe that moving in the summer months would be best for the young’uns. That’s changed. Vacation-time for them is getting shorter and shorter. Besides, it’s January and you’ve got to be on-the-job in two-weeks. You’re going to be doing the advance work first. The owner of the company has already said he’d give you a paid leave-of-absence to cart everyone to the new site later on. In the mean time the rest of the family will be holding down the fort in the old location, talking to realtors and getting all of the other stuff taken care of.
And if you do move during the summer months, it can actually be cruel for the brood. Why? Who will they get to know in the new city? Don’t think you’re going to get them into “Camp Runamuck” a few days before it starts and get them a seat at the picnic table. These places are usually booked-up months in advance.
Getting the children socialized to the other people their age is best done in school.
Since your company, has already demonstrated a high-degree of decency, talk to HR. They might be able to help you find some decent schools in the new town.
Since you’ve got a week before you become the new manager in Big Sky Country, time to check out the educational institutions. You’ll want to apply for transfer to the new schools. That’s easy because your trio of off-springs are all great students.
Once you’ve found a new home, secured a loan, contact your Austin movers, and have all the creature comforts turned-on, you head back to the old casa in February to bring the family to Missoula.
The brief time-off for the kids while you make the drive can actually re-energize their supple brains. Spend a couple of nights in Denver. The snow will do them good. It will likewise get them used to the winter climate they’re about to encounter in Montana. Stop-off for a couple nights in Salt Lake City. At this point, you want the little ones to think you’re on a mini winter vacay.
Ages and Moving
Headshrinkers say that little ones between 5-and-10 can handle things better than teens. They are more bonded to you and mom than they are to their friends they left behind. Just make sure you keep an open dialog with them so you can smooth-over any concerns they may run into.
Teens? Oh boy. This is the age when they usually are seeking independence from their parents. Where do they get this sense of self-identity? Usually from other teens. The deal is: Get your kid in a space where they get a daily shot of self-esteem. Open your home to the desirables in the neighborhood. It not only makes the relocation run more smoothly, but later in life they’ll be able to deal with stress in a healthy, meaningful and productive manner. Remember, you don’t want to be their best friend. You just want to be the people who have answers to problems they throw at you.
Whatever age, relocating during the school year makes more sense. It will also make things less stressful for you. After all, you’re excited about your new position and raise, so why not enjoy it!